Holy Spirit breathe on me

until my heart is free

let sunshine fill my inward parts

with not a cloud between

Holy Spirit breathe on me

fill me with power divine

kindle a flame of love and zeal

within this heart of mine

Breathe on me

breathe on me

Holy Spirit breathe on me

take thou my heart

cleanse every part

oh Holy Spirit breathe on me

A few friends on this site and others have been asking me to tell a little more about myself so I will, but don't blame me if it bores you for it was not my idea.

In a recent blog I shared a very precious experience I had with The Lord during a time of great blessing and favour and the lesson I learned from it. I called the blog "The long, dark tunnel." What I have since come to understand is that this was not just an isolated experience or sequence of events but was in fact a "prophetic picture" God was really showing me what was about to happen, what has happened and indeed what is happening right now in my christian walk. I am very much the girl in that tunnel, and a very dark one it is too, I am also that fledgling blackbird who came to grief against the wall and plopped down in the long grass to preen and to sort himself out.

The picture is so strikingly accurate of what has happened to me and is happening that I am filled with awe at this wonderful,wonderful Lord that I walk with, even in the very dark places of the earth, He is right there and doesn't leave us alone, no, not for a second, we may lose the peace and joy of His presence and our way may become so very dark that we cannot see so much as an inch in front of our noses, especially if we are in disobedience or backsliding. The devil will all but scream at us that we are forsaken and that God has after all repented that He ever saved us, we might look back and scarcely be able to discern the beginnings of our faith and we might look ahead and not be able to make out even the faintest glimmer of light ahead to guide us forward, reach out and touch the wall and do not ever give up to despair, you must go on, turning back may seem like an option but that is to surrender to the sneering, hate-filled voice of Satan. Say no, no, never Mr devil, he is a liar, a thief and a murderer, if you pay heed to his voice you are yielding yourself to his will for your life-how happy he will be-keep contact with that wall, prayer if you like,the word of God if you like, praise, fellowship in the things of The Holy Spirit. And if the going forward be a painfully, painful slow affair, yet go forward still. Trust in God, He is faithful, He will bring you forth as pure gold tried and tested in the fire of adversity. And when He has brought you back out once more into the sunshine He will reveal Himself to you and show you His plan for your life.

But I am still inside the tunnel, no shimmer of light yet appears up ahead, my great peace and comfort is this, that God took time and patience to show me beforehand that these things would be, and just as surely as the trials and tribulations have come to pass, why, this very fact is the firm assurance that I have that there will be an end. There shall be a coming forth. The Sun of righteousness will yet arise with healing in His wings, His light will yet arise upon me and my glory will come. All praise and honour and glory be unto Him Who is mighty and has done wonderous things for me.    

A few years ago I was working in a drug rehabilitation unit in London. It was a time of great blessing and learning, God's Spirit was working mightily and people were being saved and set free, how awesome God is when He is moving among His people, how gently He works to keep everyone working together in hearts and mind, unity among christians is essential if a work of the Holy Spirit is to be maintained.

It was a glorious early september afternoon, not a single cloud was in the sky and there had been much blessing and joy at the re-hab so I took a stroll alongside the river Thames, the sun on my shoulders was like being wrapped in a warm shawl, indeed I felt all wrapped up in love. I came to a place in my walk where overhead two dual carriage ways lay side by side spanning eight lanes of traffic and a tunnel running underneath that would be about a 1/4 of a mile long, it looked very dark and spooky, yet I was reluctant to turn back so in I went. As soon as I entered the darkness and the sun was cut off thoughts came into my mind, I knew they were not my thoughts, they were accusing thoughts, accusing that is against God, yet somehow I could not turn them off. "There you are, doing the work of the Lord, but where is God? you have such needs, why doesn't He answer your prayers? He is sat on His throne all glorious above, you are the one who is lonely, you are the one who has to put up with the sneers and insults of unbelievers as well as the mis-understandings sometimes of brothers-surely God has hung you out to dry. etc, etc" the thoughts kept coming and I felt defenceless against them, anyone who has read Pilgrims Progress will recognise that this was Christian's experience as he walked through the valley when one of the wicked ones got behind him and "whisperingly suggested many grevious blasphemies to him," but unlike Christian who could not tell that the voice was not his own mind I knew whose voice it was. Meanwhile the tunnel went on and on and had become darker and darker and with it the thoughts became more sneering and accusing, and yet still I felt no authority from the Lord that I could rebuke it. I looked behind, there was now no trace of the tunnel entrance, nor was there any trace of the exit and it was so dark now that the only way to progress was to keep contact with the tunnel wall, I became afraid. Inching along as I was it seemed an endless age until faintly up ahead I could discern the exit tunnel, and as I drew nearer I was able to go faster and faster as it became lighter until the last 50 yards I was running with might to get out once more into the bright, warm sunshine. As I came out immediately there was a disturbance among the tall grass growing against the wall, I went to investigate and lo there was the most darling blackbird just a fledgeling still, he had seemingly come to grief against the wall and was so busy preening himself and sorting out his feathers he did not notice me. Oh such a love came into my heart for him indescribable and so I reached down (foolishly) to see if I could lift him up. Of course he saw me and with a chirrup of alarm he scrambled away and into the air, away he flew and my heart longed after him. Immediately God spoke "I want to teach you" God said "I have allowed these things to happen so that I could show you, the love you felt in your heart for that bird is a type of the love that I feel for you, and just as you saw everything that surrounded the object of your love, so also I see, I see everything that comes within your experience and life, nothing can come near you that I have not allowed, but what if the heavens were opened and you were to see God stretching His hands towards you? But I will pour my thoughts upon you." This is the longest blog I have done and I hope I have not wearied you with it, I hesitated and prayed much whether or not to share it because I know people have problems about the gifts of the Spirit and whether God speaks or not. I hope it will be a blessing, certainly it was a most precious experience and lesson for me.    

My Dove is stood beyond our wall

and will I keep Him there?

Bids me Him? join Him where He is?

His shame and loneliness to share.

I was asleep with heart awaked,

my Dove was at the door.

He wooed with tender words of love

and I could make Him wait no more.

My Dove put His hand 'pon the latch,

my heart thrilled with delight.

I rose to open up to Him

but He was gone, into the night.

Sustain me with raisins

refresh me with apples

for I am sick with love.

My heart had failed me when He spoke.

I sought but found Him not.

I called out to Him in my sorrow,

My Lord, My Dove forsake me not.

Oh where is my Beloved gone

and my Dove, where is He turned.

City girls talk much about love,

there's a love which cannot be learned.

There is my Beloved, my Dove

He's pasturing His sheep.

See Him gathering the lilies.

I knew my heart's pledge He would keep.